I am Michelle D. Carter

Everything in moderation. That’s what the “experts” will tell you. It doesn’t matter what it is, as long as you do it in moderation, you are OK. It is the inability to take things in moderation that puts you over the edge and it becomes an addiction. All you can think about it getting your next “fix.”

My husband’s addiction is caffeine in the form of Diet Coke. On average, he will drink 80 ounces of the stuff EVERY DAY!! PEOPLE, THAT IS JUST OVER A SIX PACK EVERY SINGLE DAY!!!

I try to do my part. I don’t buy it that often when I grocery to the store. Mainly because occasionally I’d like to have one but when I go to drink one, THEY ARE ALL GONE! If Tim’s the one who goes to the store, it will some how end up in the refrigerator. Or, he’ll have to make a Lowe’s run and when he gets home, he’ll be carrying around a 44 ounce drink.

We’ve discussed the need for him to cut back. He agrees but it never seems to happen. The other day at the doctor, he confessed how much he was drinking. The doctor said, “Well, at least it’s diet.” Umm, thanks doc. Don’t think you could have helped me out a little?!

The other night, Tim and I were talking and he tells me that: “on the way to work the other day I didn’t have any cash on me. I wanted a Diet Coke. I remembered that I had a receipt from Sonic that if I did a survey, I would get a free Diet Coke. I completed the survey just as I arrived at Sonic.”

Me: “And yet you don’t think you have a problem.”

Doing whatever it takes to get your next “fix” – that’s when you can tell you are addicted. I can tell you about Tim’s addiction because I am perfect. I don’t have any addictions. NOW GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY EFFING COFFEE!!

Christmas is always such a fun, magical, crazy, pain in the ass time of year. So many emotions trying to keep a handle on everything. It’s exhausting! When my daughter was first born, my husband laid down the law and said we were going to have Christmas morning in our house from here on out. It was the tradition he was setting. At first I was not happy with him. At the time we were living in the same town as his family. My family was five hours away. That was saying to me, that we would be spending every Christmas with his family, while my family got Thanksgiving. I grew up where we alternated holidays. One year we’d spend Thanksgiving with Mom’s side of the family while Dad’s side got Christmas. Then the following year, we’d spend Thanksgiving with Dad’s side and Mom’s side got Christmas. That seems like a fair solution to me. Yet, here is my husband completely rocking that boat. As the years went on, I was glad Tim had decided Christmas morning was at our own home. It’s hard enough to pack the whole family up for a trip let alone include Christmas in the mix.

This Christmas was our first Christmas in South Carolina. See, it was a good thing we had decided not to travel. First of all, the drive would have been awful. Twenty hours in a van with three children – makes me want to slit my wrists just thinking about it. Not to mention that we would have had to drive through tons and tons of snow and cold. My Mom said they couldn’t even get out of their front door and it took a lot of pushing to open the back door. Although, my kids would have loved to have been there to play in the snow. All three of them kept asking MOM, WHEN IS IT GOING TO SNOW HERE? I digress.

Typically, my kids are really good about going to bed Christmas Eve. They know that in order for Santa to come, they have to be asleep. For some reason, I had a tough time going to sleep Christmas Eve. Maybe it was the excitement of Christmas morning, wondering if the kids (Tim included) would enjoy their gifts. Maybe it was the holiday classic I was watching, Forensic Files. I shut the TV off around 1:00 in the morning. GIRLFRIEND, YOU HAVE GOT TO GET SOME SLEEP. As I lay there, I started to hear some commotion upstairs. What are those kids doing? Surely they won’t try to come downstairs. It is way too early. Shortly there after, I hear the pitter patter of little feet on the stairs and the glow of the flashlight swinging about. I come out of my bedroom and find ALL THREE of them about half way down the stairs shining the flashlight directly on the presents “St. Nick” had left hours before.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING? GET BACK TO BED! They hurried back up the stairs totally shocked they had been busted.

Around 6:00 am, I can hear them waking up and getting around. I got up to brush my teeth so I’d be ready when they came downstairs. However, I didn’t have time to complete my task when I hear MOM AND DAD’S LIGHT IS ON, WE CAN GO DOWN.

With the master bedroom on the main level, gone are the days of telling the kids WAIT FOR US BEFORE YOU GO DOWNSTAIRS. I had barely peed when Alyssa brought her new skateboard in to show me.

The excitement – that’s what I love most about Christmas. It’s what makes the exhaustion worth it.

I apologize for being so behind on my blogging. I swear the time fairy comes in and snatches time away from me. I start each day with a list of tasks I need to accomplish then about half way through it is time to pick the kids up from school. It has nothing to do with the fact that I tend to over extend myself or that I’ve had writers block. Sometimes I’ll stare out the window and believe that everything is magically getting done. All my hopes and dreams are being accomplished as well. It’s nice living in an imaginary world. That is until I’m ruthlessly pulled back to reality.

It has always been a Carter tradition to make sugar cookies for Santa. I received the recipe several years ago from my cousin, Kim. It is a process to make them BUT everyone is involved and it is a lot of fun.

First, the kids and I make the dough. In years past I used to make a double batch of the dough because we LOVE to eat cookie dough. However, with all the e coli outbreaks, specifically Nestlé’s chocolate chip cookie dough, we don’t do that anymore! Although everyone tends to grab a little bit here and there. After the dough has been refrigerated for a few hours or overnight, I roll it out. The kids use the cookie cutters. Tim is responsible for the oven and moving them to the cooling racks. Then the next day is comprised of making icing and the kids getting to decorate with sprinkles. There are always lots of sprinkles everywhere. Some cookies you’d think are nothing but a big pile of sprinkles!

Here’s a picture from this year. Getting ready for Santa…

Yesterday marked a milestone in the Carter household. It was our twelfth wedding anniversary.

There were no big celebrations, just an ordinary day. Tim was working on a few projects around the house, which, of course, meant a couple trips to the hardware store. Upon his return from his first trip with Alyssa, she brought in a dozen roses.

She said, “These are from Daddy. He said there is one rose for each year you’ve been married.”

Awe, that was sweet!! And the roses were very pretty!

Just because there wasn’t big showers of gaga over one another doesn’t mean the spark is dying. The spark is very much alive. Tim and I show our love and affection EVERY DAY. And yes, there have definitely been some difficult times in our lives, in our marriage, but we always work through them.

So, thank you, Tim, for being the love of my live 365 days a year instead of just one.

Last week Tim and I traveled to Greenville to find a home. Tim flew in before I did as he needed to be there for work. My parents came to take care of the kids. I spent a couple of days getting laundry done, making sure there was plenty to eat and anything else I could to help my parents.

At one point I asked Alex if he was going to miss me. I expected him to say yes. He tends to be a little clingy and wants to make sure every detail is covered before it happens. He is just like his Mom. However, this is what I heard, “Mom, it’s only four days. It’s no big deal.” OUCH!!!

Every night while we were gone, we would call the kids and talk to them about their day. One night while talking to Alex he says to me, “Mom, I miss you.”

Me: “Aww, I miss you too, buddy. We’ll be home soon.”

Tim: “What about me? Do you miss me?”

Alex: “Umm, not so much.” OUCH!!!

As Tim is absorbing the shock of his comment, I couldn’t help but laugh. I know, I wasn’t very sympathetic and if it was reversed, I would have been devastated.

Alex tried to redeem himself: “Mom, Dad isn’t here as much.”

Tim didn’t find much comfort in his redemption. However, he did understand. Poor Daddy. I had to remind Tim that as soon as he gets home from work, all the kids want him and I’m nothing more than chopped liver. It was nice that I was missed for a change.

Do you see the glass as half full or half empty?

Tim and I were talking this morning about different things we have going on and how we thought they’d turn out. Each of us put our perspective on the possible outcomes. We were at complete opposite ends of the spectrum.

I have always been the half empty type. I see myself more as a realist. I base a lot of it on past experience. Heck, even Dr. Phil will tell you that the best indicator of future behavior is how things have been in the past. I like to aim low. If I have low expectations and that’s what happens, then that’s what I expected. Then if things turn out better, that’s great! Even better!

Tim is the half full type. When we have discussions like we did this morning, I think the man is just plain crazy. I tell him that he’s just setting himself up for failure. When things don’t go the way he hopes, he’ll just be disappointed with the outcome.

After we talk, Tim and I tend to balance ourselves out to a happy medium (most of the time). He’ll bring me out of my dismal pathetic attitude. I get his head out of the clouds and a little bit closer to reality. It is a relationship that works well.

So tell me, which are you?

The other night Tim took an Ambien before bed. After a little TV watching I had fallen asleep. Once I’m asleep, I don’t like to be messed with. Tim knows this but apparently he didn’t seem to care that night.

He started to get a little frisky. I certainly wasn’t in the mood and pushed him away. Then he takes his pillow and puts it half on my face. What the heck? Getting more frustrated with him, I move to the edge of my side of the bed. He moves over and uses me as a body pillow. He has his hand on my back and his legs over mine.

By now, I’m really ticked off! I get up and decide to go sleep with Alyssa. Tim says, “Where you going?” I didn’t think it warranted an answer so I kept walking.

The following night, we are headed to bed and I swat Tim on the butt. I tell him, “That’s for last night.”

Tim: “What are you talking about?”

I begin the story.

He starts to laugh and says, “You’re making this up.”

Me: “Oh no I’m not!” I tell him more.

Tim, laughing: “I don’t remember any of this. You’re making it up.”

Me, laughing: “I wish I were. I was so mad at you.”

Typically I would say that Tim’s amnesia was selective. However, this time it was definitely induced by Ambien. It is an incredible (or scary) sleep aid!

Remember the theme song to Cheers? It’s the premise for the show. It goes like this: Making your way in the world today takes everything you’ve got. Taking a break from all your worries, sure would help a lot. Wouldn’t you like to get away? Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name, and they’re always glad you came. You wanna be where you can see, our troubles are all the same. You wanna be where everybody knows your name. You wanna go where people know, people are all the same. You wanna go where everybody knows your name.

This is my husband. However, instead of a bar, it’s the pharmacy. We pull up in the drive-thru lane last night and Tim says, “Watch this, he’ll see it’s me and then go grab my prescription.”

And that is EXACTLY what happened! Now granted we were just there an hour ago dropping it off. Tim is also the one who will drop off and pick up the prescriptions for the whole family. I just think its funny Tim has his only little version of Cheers going on at the pharmacy.

The count down begins:

December 30^th – I had fallen asleep early thanks to the help of night-time cold medicine. However, Tim kept watching TV. I tossed and turned, obviously, he wasn’t getting the hint that he was keeping me awake. Finally around midnight I ask, “How much more TV do you plan to watch?”

Tim: “I don’t know, why?”

Me: “I think maybe you should go downstairs and watch it then.”

I’m sure it was my sweet charming personality that finally convinced him to shut the TV off. Moments later the room was dark and I was able to drift back off in my medicated fog.

Three hours later, the bug in Tim’s lower intestine was ready to emerge – and NOT quietly. I could hear Tim’s cries of agony. Feeling nothing but sympathy for the poor guy, I think to myself: COME ON! All I want is to get some decent sleep. After all, I am trying to fight off a cold!

December 31^st – I awake completely wiped out and barely able to function. Somehow I managed to make myself somewhat presentable and headed to work. Luckily, the boss man let us go home early. I arrived home, ate some lunch and disappeared to my bedroom. I can’t believe it but after only a couple interruptions, I’m able to get in a little nap.

Feeling a little better, we run a couple of errands. We grab a quick bite to eat and headed home.

Tim and I knew we wouldn’t stay up until midnight. Both of us hadn’t been feeling well. The days of staying up late and seeing how much you can drink are gone. There isn’t enough time for us to recover when you have young kids to deal with the next morning. But I thought maybe we could watch a movie or something.

Tim watched a little TV with the boys. I snuggled in with Alyssa. While watching TV with her, I fell asleep. So much for the movie plan! I was asleep before 10:00 pm. Actually, I’m sure it was before 9:00 pm but…

December 31^st, 11:50 pm – Alex came into our room crying that his tummy hurt. We headed downstairs to get him some tummy medicine. I pass by Alyssa’s room. The TV is still on! I very politely (NOT) tell her, “Alyssa, it’s time to turn the TV off!”

Alyssa: “Mom, can I watch until end of this show?”

Me: “Alyssa! Turn the TV off NOW!!!”

Downstairs I find the children’s Pepto. The dog is doing circles at the back door – that’s code for her that she needs to go out and out now! After dispensing the medicine, I stumble to the back door.

BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. That freakin’ alarm, I’m gonna kill Tim for setting that damn thing. I run to the key pad and enter our code. Alex is freakin’ out and yelling Mommy. Tim awakes from his coma and runs downstairs.

I look at him and yell, “OK, I’m done with that damn system being set at night. This is the second time in three days I’ve set it off.”

December 31^st, 11:59 pm – Back in bed, I kick Tim. He mumbles, “Huh, what?”

Me: “Happy New Year.”

Tim: “Oh, yeah. Zzzzzz.”

Though my New Year’s Eve wasn’t the most exciting, it was spent with those I love. No matter how you celebrated (or didn’t), the New Year is here, make it the best you can!

Tim said years ago, that I could handle Alyssa’s bathroom issues. I told him that he would be responsible for Alex and Andy. After several cases of severe skid-marks, I told Tim he needed to step up to the plate, or should I say toilet, and teach them the proper wiping method. Hell, I don’t care if it is proper method, as long as they get the job done.

Tim neglected his duties until…yesterday. Alex was sitting on his lap.

Tim asks: “Good gravy boy, did you toot?”

Alex: “No, it’s my butt.”

A few minutes later…

Tim: “Did you toot again?”

Alex: “No, Dad, it’s my butt.”

Tim decided he needed to do a little inspection and sure enough… chunks. After removing the, well, you know. It was time for a lesson. FINALLY!!!