I am Michelle D. Carter

WHAT DID YOU DO ALL DAY? I can tell you that when these words are uttered from the lips of my husband, there will most definitely be a knock down drag out heated discussion in our household.

On the way to school the other day, my six year-old son, Andy, says MOM, WHAT DO YOU DO ALL DAY?

ARE YOU FREAKIN’ KIDDING ME??!!! DID YOUR DAD PUT YOU UP TO ASKING THAT QUESTION? SERIOUSLY! I THINK IT’S A CONSPIRACY AGAINST ME!!

The hardest, most thankless job in the world is a stay-at-home Mom. Admit it, you have heard thought or even said to someone OH, YOU’RE JUST A STAY-AT-HOME MOM. The message behind that comment is YOU SIT AT HOME AND EAT BON BONS ALL DAY. I’ll admit, I’ve thought it before I was a stay-at-home Mom. And there are some days I wonder that about myself now.

I often hear YOU HAVE SEVEN HOURS A DAY TO DO WHAT YOU CHOOSE. Yes, that’s true. Once I get the kids to school I have just about seven hours before I have to pick them up. However, I don’t always get to choose how I spend my day. In fact, I rarely choose how to spend my time. There is always something that needs to be done.

This past week after Alyssa had the H1N1 virus and went back to school, I disinfected the whole house. I did laundry. I sanitized Alyssa’s bedding and towels; in addition, to the rest of the laundry that needed to be done. I try to work out. Working out is important to health and well being not only physically but also emotionally. A well balanced Mom is important to the family. I try to write this blog. Tim’s birthday was this past week so I made him a card and baked him a cake. Don’t forget the grocery shopping and the Costco run. I pick up the stuff people tend to leave everywhere. There are just so many little things that need to get done. It all adds up. Before I know it they day is gone and I’m trying to figure out where it went while I’m trying to quickly thaw something from the freezer because I forgot to take and out and now what are we having for dinner?!!

I often wonder how I got this all done before I stayed at home. I think a lot has to do with that when I worked, I didn’t have to defend myself everyday. Now I do. I have to defend myself because this didn’t get done because of that or that didn’t get done because of this. Did you notice how I defended that I work out?! If something didn’t get done before, it wasn’t that big of a deal. Now if I don’t get something done I have to walk on eggshells. What am I going to do if my boss fires me?

I feel I’m failing miserably at everything in my life. I’m not working outside the home; therefore I’m not contributing financially. I was hoping I could make a little money by writing this blog but that hasn’t worked either. I work out but can’t really lose any weight. I know a lot has to do with my eating habits but changing them is hard. And I’m not too much of a Susie homemaker either. I hate cleaning house. I hate to cook. I have some of the pickiest people in the world living in my house. Trying to find something that they will all eat is like trying to find the needle in the haystack.

So what am I doing? I’m struggling to find my place in life. Where do I fit in? Where is that balance?

1. Brad R. Says:
   December 11th, 2009 at 11:13 am

   Michelle,

   Love reading your blog when I get the chance. Great to see updates on where you are and what you’re up to these days. You have a great family and love to read about your many adventures and experiences. Don’t ever doubt for a second what your purpose in life is or where you should fit in. The most important ‘job’ in the world is being a good mom and it looks like you have that handled with no problem. You may have doubts and second thoughts along the way, but focus on raising those three great kids and teaching them everything they need to know in life. All the little stuff won’t be remembered when they’re older, but they will always remember their parents unconditional love and support. Hang in there and keep up the good work! Hope you have a great holiday season!