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Today the boys went to a birthday party. Alex kept asking, “Will I get a present?” He was really asking about a goodie bag.
It made me think: Why do we give goodie bags in the first place?
First let’s look at the financial aspect of it. If you are having a party at a facility, you are probably paying around $10 (if not more) for each child to attend, then it is expected that you give goodie bags on top of that. Typically goodie bags are filled with inexpensive trinkets that either break after playing with them for five minutes and/or candy. So really, junk. After you’ve paid for someone else’s kid to come swim, bowl, do gymnastics or whatever the party entails, you still have to give them stuff on top of that. Why?!
I don’t know how we got in the habit of giving goodie bags. I know that when I was a kid, I never got one when I left a party. If I were to guess, I’d have to say that it stems from making all kids feel special. Like how everyone gets a trophy for just participating in a sport. You don’t even get to be special on your own birthday anymore. You have to give your friends junk so their feelings aren’t hurt.
Have you heard about Bill Gates’ High School speech about the Eleven Rules of Life? No? You can view them here. However, they aren’t from Bill Gates. It’s really from Charles Sykes. He talks about how this feel-good, politically correct teaching has created a full generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept sets them up for failure in the real world.
This is so true. It’s just like the plot from The Incredibles. Once everyone is special, then no one is special.
Let’s get back to the basics of letting someone be special when they deserve it. Mothers of the Internet unite, NO MORE GOODIE BAGS! Who’s with me??
January 18th, 2009 at 5:14 pm
I so want to be with you. At this very minute I am planning Peanut’s birthday party and writing an article for Root & Sprout on birthday parties. I HATE goody bags. I hate all the cheap crap that’s in them. I hate the gum and candy that my kids don’t need. Believe me, I let them eat plenty of candy, but a lot of the stuff they get in the bag they don’t like so it lays around my kitchen. I don’t want to pass out a goody bag at the party, but I know I have to. I refuse to give that kind of junk, though. I’m not going to spend more, but I’m going to think it through. Something kids can use like the little play dough (their 3-5 year olds) a healthy snack pack and, yes, a little piece of candy. But NO PENCILS! I have so many freakin’ pencils around my house! I hate them!
Thanks so much for the chance to vent. I feel a little better now.
January 18th, 2009 at 7:48 pm
The first time I went to a grandchilds birthday party and all the little guests were given a little gift, I was a little surprised. I also thought that the birtday person was the “only” one to have their special day. Just being together eating cake and ice cream and having fun should be enough. I also know that a lot has changed since my “children” where little. But sometimes a person just needs to draw the line on what needs to be done. Most of the time I felt lucky enough to afford what we could just for our family.
January 18th, 2009 at 7:53 pm
I don’t do goodie bags, it could be that I’m cheap, or not creative, or I’m a last minute Lucy, probably all of them. But I hate goodie bags too…do the neighborhood kids hate me?