This entry was posted
on Wednesday, September 17th, 2008 at 11:50 am and is filed under Parenting.
You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
As I posted yesterday’s blog, I began to think about my daughter. I realized that I really hadn’t blogged that much about her. I began to wonder why. Was it because the boys are just naturally ornerier and therefore make more humorous blogs? Was it because she was older and you begin to expect more from your older children, or perhaps a combination of the two?
Once the boys were born, she immediately took the back seat. My focus wasn’t on just one new baby it was two. New babies demand a lot of your time. We followed the advice of the experts and tried to make her feel included. We’d have her get the diapers for us, help feed them, etc.
Now that the boys are older and more self-sufficient, I notice I still rely on Alyssa to be my helper. When they have to go to the restroom while we are out, Alyssa always volunteers to take them. As they head to the restroom I wonder if I should follow.
The boys will get on my last nerve and Alyssa will tell them, “Boys, I don’t think Mom is in any mood to hear that.”
And so I begin to think, have I pushed her to be a responsible person or have I robbed her of being young and carefree. I know there has to be a happy medium but have I pushed it too far?
I have noticed that I do expect more of her. And when she does what she is supposed to do, I often don’t tell her how great she’s doing. I expect her to be better. I expect her to do what she is supposed to do. I expect more and more from her.
Realizing this, last night I sat down with her and told her how proud of her I am. She is doing great in school. Her handwriting is beautiful (she used to try to race through and it was hard to read). That I’m proud she is reading better. I’m pleased that she comes home and gets right on her homework without me having to harass her about it. Her response, “Sometimes I start it on the bus ride home.”
And so, Alyssa, I am very proud of you!!!! I will try to work on that happy medium. You are growing up to be a fine young lady. I love you very much!
September 17th, 2008 at 1:20 pm
Michelle,
I never got the impression that you were leaving your daughter out of your blog. As a matter of fact, she has always been painted in a very positive first born light. My firstborn is much like yours, responsible almost to a fault, and very mature for his age. It turns out I am so thankful for this, since the next one in line is the opposite. I don’t love him any less, but he takes a lot more of my energy…
September 17th, 2008 at 7:50 pm
I know just what you mean. MA is 6 years older than Diva and is now old enough to babysit her sisters. When her dad has to travel I really rely on her to help me out. I try to recognize her help and reward her with either money or something special. Sometimes just a word of thanks is nice, but I try to do a little extra also. It’s easy to just take her for granted.