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Tim left for the lake Friday night. I decided I’d take the kids to McDonald’s. As always, the kids ran to the to the play area while I ordered dinner. It was a happenin’ place with lots of kids running around. I let them play a little before sitting down to eat. Pretty soon Alex comes up to the table and says there is someone pulling their hair. He runs off so I didn’t think too much about it. Moments later, both boys come running to report more hair pulling.
I decide at that point it’s time to sit down and eat and let things cool off a bit. Some lady is following Alyssa and is asking her if she is being nice. I immediately go into defensive mode and respond with, “I was told that they were doing the pulling.”
She walks off and says, “OK, but you’re a lot older than them by about four years.”
I respond with, “And that makes it alright?” But she was out of ear shot by then.
I turn to Alyssa and say, “Tell me everything that is going on. Don’t lie to me. Tell me the truth and we’ll work through it.” I’m trying to instill honesty. I may not like what they did but if they are honest with me, we’ll get through it. Alyssa has been honest with me in the past and has confessed to things that she knew was wrong but did them anyway. I tell her I am proud of her for telling me the truth and then we deal with the situation. She knows the punishment isn’t going to be as sever due to her honesty.
She begins, “When I got to the top of the slide, those girls said I was too old to be in here. I said no it’s over 12 and I’m only 8. Then they pulled my hair. I told them to stop but when they didn’t I pulled theirs back.”
“OK, so they pulled first, not you, is that correct?”
“Yes.”
“OK, even though they pulled your hair first, it is still not OK for you to pull their hair. If you tell them to stop and they don’t, you need to come get me. OK?”
“OK, Mom.”
“You guys are going to sit here and eat and you are not going back in to play until they leave.”
They finished eating, by then the “other” people had left. I said it was now safe for them to go play.
Pretty soon Alyssa comes to tell me that there is a boy jumping on her. Good gravy, what the heck is going on? “Mom, you told me to come get you next time and I am.” By the way, it was a full moon.
“That’s right.” I go in to see what’s going on.
Alex yells at the kid, “You were stepping on my sister!” Awe, they do love each other and will stick up for each other.
“Try to stay away from him. We’ll be leaving soon.”
As I begin to throw our trash away, in walks the “other” people from before. They came back. She begins to yell at me, “I want to show you this. Do you see the scratch on her face? This is not OK.”
I try to tell her that her kids started it. It still didn’t make it OK that my daughter had retaliated. However, if they hadn’t started it, it wouldn’t have happened.
She keeps yelling and doesn’t let me say a word. She screams at the guy cleaning up, “Where’s the manager?” He points to the front of the restaurant. She stomps off and screeches, “Take care of your fxxxing brat.” Yes folks, she dropped an “F” bomb that could be heard for blocks.
We were already leaving but I tell the kids again to get their stuff it is time to go.
She is now at the front of the restaurant yelling at the staff, “That bitch right there.” Real nice from an upstanding citizen trying to set an example for her daughter!!
Obviously McDonald’s can’t do anything about it and she leaves in a huff.
I spoke with the Manager and apologized for the incident. He couldn’t believe the scene she caused. The whole restaurant knew about it.
As we were exiting the restaurant, I told the kids to hurry across the parking lot. It wouldn’t surprise me if she was waiting to run us over.
“Mom, did she say take care of your fxxxing brat?” Alyssa asks.
“Yes, dear, she did.” We talked about it again. The scratch was caused by Alyssa pushing the girl back as she was pulling her hair and she hit the slide. It is human nature to defend yourself. I understand what my daughter did.
Life is a learning experience and Alyssa has learned a valuable lesson. I am proud of her.
By the way, I could have taken her!
August 18th, 2008 at 11:47 am
Right on!
Bullies no matter where you find them need to be taken care of. Any parent willing to berate another in public only makes themselves look bad. I am on your side. Way to go both of you! And the boys for being tough guys standing up for their sis! This is one reason why we don’t do play areas at restaurants. It would be nice if all parents could see that all kids are not perfect angels and must be able to share blame in situations like this.
I just think our kids (ones raised with responsibility and honesty as important factors in life) are going to be hands and feet over the competition when they get older because they will not have to learn it under more important circumstances.
August 18th, 2008 at 7:12 pm
This totally happened to use before at a burger king, other people were offended by a 2 year old wearing soft soled shoes, like it would hurt their precious charges. Meanwhile, said precious charges are bullying in the play structure and peeing in the place….yuck! Of course, they yelled at US!
August 18th, 2008 at 10:10 pm
Wow, that is one classy mom. I’m glad you and your kids did not get seriously hurt. That’s what I hate about those places. Some parents just let their kids run crazy and don’t care what they do.